Dale and I are both Primary Teachers. We met back in College and hung out with the same group of friends for a few years before we actually started dating. After 11 months we got engaged and were married 5 months later.
I don’t know if it’s because we are both teachers, but we have always loved to talk about what we want out of life, and how we will go about achieving it. Even before our kids came along, we would spend hours talking about how we would like to parent our children and what we would do in different scenarios. We would talk and discuss until we were both on the same page. We have a strong belief in spending time now raising our children to be the adults we want to see. It is critical that we teach them the values we want to see now rather than waiting until they are teenagers or older. This however, is not an easy journey! So often for the short term, it would be easier to give in to our kids and let them do as they please, however, we understand that this can be detrimental for their entire wellbeing.
For one of our anniversaries we went out for a nice lunch together at a beautiful café in one of the wineries in the Hunter Valley. We had at least one child then and had faced a few issues with family and how we want to raise our children. We decided that we would spend time reflecting on what we want for our kids.
This is what we came up with:
Our Goal as Parents –
We want to raise children who are:
- God-centred
- Respectful and respected
- Thoughtful and considerate of others
- Driven and have a desire to learn and do their best
- Not consumed by materialistic things
- Have manners
- Humble and serving
- Self-controlled
Our Strategies –
- Set boundaries – be firm, yet kind and loving
- Modelling appropriate behaviour and expectations
- Not giving our children everything that they want – delayed gratification
- Being consistent – following through with what is said
- Encourage manners and respect
- Have fun and make positive memories
- Be the adult!
Kids need clear boundaries in order to feel safe.
Be what you want them to be!!
Of course, we are not the perfect parents, and different stages of our journey require different strategies and approaches to life. This is our vision which we spend time reflecting on and revising.
What is your vision for your kids, and how are you going about achieving that?
